Risks and Consequences

"Don't mind him, I'm just using our appointment as an opportunity to teach my son about the risks and consequences of self-medicating with prescription steroids."

Specific Locations

"So like I told your secretary on the phone, those experimental weight loss pills have had some extreme side effects. As you can see I only lost weight in a few very specific locations and the worst part is that the areas that stayed fatty seem to be slowly gaining back all the weight I lost."

Major Gains

 
When Daniel first started juicing he cut costs by mail ordering from a pharmacy south of the border who only required a phone consultation from their in-house doctor. He wasn't quite sure what steroids he was getting on account of his limited Spanish, but he had insisted it didn't matter as long they were strong. That was months ago now and instead of improving his gains he only seemed to be losing stamina and muscle definition. When he woke up this morning it was worse than ever. He now felt soft and fat, jiggly even. It was only when he looked in the mirror that he realized he'd finally made some major gains.

Youth Formula

Notable Side Effects

"You have a clean bill of health and apart from these notable side effects
the follicle rejuvenation treatment has been a complete success.
Your hair is now so thick I'm actually a little jealous, Marshall."

Enlarged Prostate

"Doctor, since we started these injections my waist has shrunk, my hips expanded and now it appears I'm growing breasts. Are you sure this is the best way to treat an enlarged prostate?"